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Thursday, March 19, 2009

Had a call early in the morn at 6am... missed the first but came the next right away... saw the number and had guess it happened...

My grandma had passed away in the nursing home... had very bad relation with her and my grandpa ever since i was young with my family... its an issue that no one will ever understands unless they are in our shoes... they had moved to the nursing home after my first darling came to the world... not chasing them away but seems better for them as the care there will be more for them...

Grandma had been in the nursing home later than grandpa... that makes her leave our house for about 2 years while grandpa 3 years... ever since her last fall at home she is already not in her right mind... not that she is crazy but just more to a vegetable lying on the bed all day... sometimes u dun even noe if she noes u or duno u... jus lying there awake but mind gone... she is able to see but jus not able to move at all... like an de-flated doll lying there... even if she drops her arm off the bed it will jus left dangling there unless someone picks up for her...

Sad to see her in this manner... cos its much too cruel for her... yes that its prob her punishment from God... but its dragging her too long... finally God takes her away... its a relief for her and us... Mom had been running around for the two of them... which grandpa used to be at CCK and grandma at Changi... then mths back grandpa moved to Hougang (Mental Hospital... but its the Ren Ci nursing home in there)... but still its tedious cos so far away from our place...

Not only the distance that is a prob... even the cost... staying in nursing home doesnt comes cheap... thou govt grant is avail but they doesnt help much... staying in there and the needs they required... the diapers cost us alot too... and for them to admit hospital its almost like a second home for them... almost 3 times or more per month... the ambulance fees...

Thou i hate them alot... but seeing them being tortured with their illness makes me sad for them too... now its more to pity them then hating them... the call came to me is no surprise to me... i tot i will not shed a tear at all... but i did... but its a relief for her... no funerals for her and we will not mention to our relatives... saves all the trouble... they have no children too... guess its jus our family tradition of keeping the unhappiness or trouble to ourselves...

May grandma be happy in her own world now... happy to finally get away from her pain... i will miss her thou i hate her... cos guess her sufferings from God have makes us lessen our hates...

"Grandma... i m sorry tat for the request i m asking for but guess u will understand y i asked for it... may u take grandpa with you soon too... he is suffering too much... pls let him rest peacefully and enjoy with you in your world..."

The love between my grandparents are very strong... being separated for three years is also a hard thing for them... but we got no choice as no nursing home will be able to take both of them in together... now jus hope my grandpa will get to see my grandma soon... God let him go... its painful for him to suffer for so long...

Blogged @ 8:40 AM

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Wednesday, March 18, 2009
























Been lazy and busy to blog for the past 1 mth... now oso rushing out... upload the some pics to satisfy the needs of readers...

Had been busy with making breakfast and dinner for my family... simply love cooking... love the sight of them when they eat... trying and learning new dishes for them... hehe...

Had been crazy about reading these days... been reading twilight saga... addicited to the novel... imagine not sleeping and reading throughout... took me 5days to finish all 4 books... crazy... been buying alot of books to occupy my time too... hehe... crazy... but its better than to waste my time away which will lead me to thinking to the wrong things again... haha...

Brought my dears to Disney on Ice... Princesses... last monday... hehe... was a very nice show... the performers skate so well... the princesses so pretty... darlings so happy to watch them...


Blogged @ 2:42 PM


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